No, we're not to the adoption point, and it still may be years. But we're hearing the names, learning of broken hearts, realizing the needs of homes for these little guys and gals, just entering the world.
We're being given even more chances to hit our knees, not for ourselves (though I would love for things to go my way), but for mothers and fathers whose worlds have fallen out from under them unexpectedly.
And we're waiting with hope for our crazy family to grow once again - not just with a baby, but with yet another mother who needs hope, renewal - someone to fight in prayer on her behalf.
We've had many ask why. And though, between homeschooling, fostering, and the rest of our nutty choices, I've grown use to the Why's, I have struggled over this one more than the others.
We've always longed to adopt. It's never been plan b. You know that if you know us well. Through a journey of exploring international, foster care adoption, and domestic, the deepest places of our hearts, long for all three. But, WHOA NELLIE, one at a time.
I have friends who have chosen life and adoption for their children. I have friends who have been adopted. I have friends who've survived the broken world of foster care. I even have friends who've had to surrender their children to foster care for a season. These are some of the reasons Jamie and fight this daily battle.
It's true. The tide could very well turn, and we could adopt some of the children who come through our home, but our hearts haven't lost the longing to pursue that one child, that one mother, that one hope.
So, we're waiting. But we know...
Our new child won't look like us. Our new child may not be "healthy." Our new child could be any color or race. It could be a boy or a girl. And our new child will never know a day where he doesn't know his mother's name, where he doesn't hear that name prayed for, hoped for, fought for.
Adoption transformed my life. I have friends who take offense to equating adoption with the gospel. But, the gospel is about transformation.
Adoption is about someone fighting for you, pursuing you, calling hope out in you, when you never even knew it was possible.
So, for as much as adoption is about our new little one who we long for more than words can express...there's also a mother, a father, we long to join in the fight of hope for.
That's the why.