Eight Crazy Things People Have Said, and My Ungracious Responses

Photo Credit: Puzzlingposts.com

Does it ever seem the moment you close your eyes and step out onto the roaring sea in faith by the grace of God, you simultaneously welcome the observations, recommendations and advice of strangers, friends, and family?

The nodding heads murmuring, Watch out. You're gonna drown.

That poses a problem.

Because I am sarcastic.

I'm the one who cackles at funerals or sitting at the foot of death bed moments.

It's not that I don't care and ache; it's more that I have issues.

As a result, I've been less than gracious towards comments made to us during this foster care adventure.

Many Some of these same things once came out of my mouth before I understood, before I was educated on the needs of the hurting in our city.

But sometimes when you're in the grocery store wrestling a mess of kids, you don't jump straight to the hope you profess and remember how God has graciously opened your eyes.

Instead, my little self-righteous sinner flares her defensive head, and for a carnal moment it feels oh so good.

1. Are those foster kids? I didn't even know there were white foster children.

~ No, you're right. I have the only four white children in care in our city. 
We specifically requested them.

2. All these kids can't be yours! They don't look like you. 

~ No. Oh dear, I thought they were yours. 
Should we call the police?

3. You can't be her mama! How are you gonna do her hair?

~ I thought you would do it for me. 
Could you do mine too while you're at it?

4. Don't you want to adopt her? Don't you love her?

~ Is this an orphanage? I'm not Annie. I have a mom and a dad. 
{This was actually our Big Sis' response. I could not believe someone asked me that in front of her!}

5. I do what you do, but with cats. It's hard; isn't it? We're amazing people.

~ Huh? Wait. What?

6. Do you want to corrupt your sons?

~ Why yes, I do! But they were already destined for issues. 
By the way, are your kids normal?

7. Don't you feel there are greater causes in the world? International children have real poverty and needs.

~ You're right. This just seemed like an easier calling. 
I don't have what it takes for the international route. So glad you do.

8. I could never do what you do. I would just love them too much to let them go.

~ Then definitely don't do foster care. 
I love them so little, letting go is a breeze.

Shame on me.

Slap me on the wrist!

I wish my heart responded as Mother Teresa:

The true inner life makes the active life burn forth and consume everything. 
It makes us find Jesus in the dark holes of the slums, in the most pitiful miseries of the poor, 
in the God-man naked on the cross.

Because really, I just want Jesus.

Praise God that He loves me in spite of my faults; that my calling is not dependent on my excellent answers and kind demeanor.

Hold me accountable to working on the sarcasm.

Because He is Worthy ~


  1. I love them so much I value my own emotions above giving kids a safe, loving space while they're in care!

  2. I've heard all of those before except the cat one. Wow. That made me almost spew milk out of my nose. LOL

    1. Would love to see that Becky :) I was stumped on that one, too!

  3. The only reason I don't respond like you is- I'm not as quick. My thoughts are likely less gracious than your thoughts...only they don't move from my brain to my lips very fast. You're sharp!

    1. I wish my brain was slower in this area, and quicker in grace ;/ I wish we could have coffee from afar.

  4. I have gotten all of these about our international adoptions (only the reverse...there are so many kids in our own country, how can you care more about foreigners?)...and I got the cat comment from my mom. Yes - my mom. Compared her grandkids to cats. I'm with Alex - too stunned at the stupidity that comes out of people's mouths to react with anything!

    1. Karen! Yes, so many of my adoptive mama friends have heard these things too. Just flip flop. Oh dear. Grace. I feel I I need it imprinted on my eyelids!

  5. Ran into a gal from my daughter's school our conversation went like this, lady: "that is going to be hard for you, don't you think?", me: "yes, we plan on it being harder than we can even fathom". lady: "you need to prepare yourself". me: "um, yes I guess". Lady: "we have thought about fostering". Me: "you have? wow, well let me know if you have any questions or need any resources. I would be happy to help you with that.....". Lady: "oh no, not children, fostering dogs, we want to foster dogs." Me: "ok, well good luck with that".

    1. I love that we can all be in this together and share the crazy things we hear and say; otherwise, we go crazy!

  6. I definitely had the cat one said to me. Wish I could think of funny responses like this though :) I get a lot of staring...I'd like to respond with "Do you have any questions??"