You value a routine, a schedule, a predictable life.
          There is no such thing as a predictable life...or day.

You treasure belongings...like hung curtains, doors and dining room chairs.
          They'll be torn down, kicked in, and cut up.

You find your reputation in your children's behavior.
          You'll be spit on, shamed and cussed at in the grocery store line...or in front of a teacher.

You take pride in never being called by your child's principal.
          You'll have a reserved seat with your name on it.

You claim a rock solid marriage.
          You'll be flailing on the floor...
                     trying to explain to one another how foster care has screwed you up.

You're not sure if your friends and family will "get it."
          They probably won't, and it's kind of lonely.

You don't believe in counseling or therapy.
          It will be your second home.

You find the need to defend yourself.
          Your life is exposed and on display...for the government.

You are afraid of a broken heart.
          It won't be broken; it will be shattered.

You think time will heal.
          Perhaps it will, only in time for it to be shattered again.

You are concerned that your "real" kids will be impacted.
          They will never be the same.

You don't do well with grief.
           It's part of your everyday conversation....every day.

You stink at paperwork and organization.
           Good luck.

You find satisfaction in your children never having cavities.
           38 cavities, Friends.

You believe the world operates in black and white.
           It's grey, and sometimes that's the worst kind of pain.

You crave comfort.
           You'll have to write on your mirror, You have an eternity for comfort.

You're prone to jealousy.
           You'll always be the runner up.

You need a pat on the back for ministry efforts.
           You are a professional seed planter.

You don't manage crisis and drama well.
           Welcome to the world of whack-a-mole.

And definitely don't dream of it....
Don't you dare consider it...
If you've checked you're clear on each and every one one of these things.

Because what you'll discover is your jealous, comfort-craving, protection-longing, treasure-hoarding heart, will finally be set free to become alive.

Because He is Worthy ~


  1. Beautifully said and oh so true.

  2. Oh how I love these words; ) Thank you

  3. Or if you LOVE sleep! ;-) What we are going through right now with a 4 week old foster baby!

  4. Thank you foe your raw honesty. I am a foster adoptive mother two girls who are sisters and we have been together over 2 years. Each day has brought different challenges and many of them occur *within* me not around me. Our MAPP classes prepared us with realistic expectations from a circumstantial and grief concept, but in carrying out the Gospel, we have had more of an on-the-job training. Thank you for this!