Remembering one of my FAVORITE posts from last May's Voices of Foster Care...


You hear it sometimes multiple times a day as a foster parent ...

I would love to do what you do but I could never...let them go.

I'm so glad you're doing this because I could never...let them go.

Good for you because I could never...let them go.

So glad God hasn't called me to this because I could never...let them go.

Or my most recent personal favorite...(not to be harsh)...but exact quote...
I do what you do too, but I collect dogs. It's the same thing really, but I could never actually do it with a person.

In this person's defense, I could never do what she does and collect dogs. So grateful someone cares for them. But not exactly the same thing.

We hear often that we are all commanded to care for the orphan, but that does not mean we are all commanded to foster or adopt. Look through scripture and the command to care bleeds from the Word. 

But folks,

A whole lot more of us are being called to foster care than are responding. 

How many of us have an extra bed in our home and can help with respite for those of us on the front lines?

How many of us have the spare seat in our car?

How many of us have multiple open bedrooms?

The recent great debate on missional living struck a deep cord with me. No, there are not classes of glamour in ministry, and we must not transform our grace into legalism. We are called, and we answer because of the grace that has been shown to us. But when we use our lives as an excuse to escape what is to be a central piece of our core and sanctification as followers of Christ, we are missing the call to be the incarnation of Christ to a dying world.

We are saved by grace alone, through faith alone. No questions asked.

But to think our salvation is for ourselves, or even that it is to remain in the context of our family is dangerous. Our salvation is a vehicle to bring His glory to earth in the spheres He places us and our families.

He has covered us in righteousness, freeing us to serve Him. Just as the Son of Man did not come to be served but to serve and give His life as a ransom for many. ~ Matthew 20:28

What is more beautiful than that? Can we truthfully look that in the face and say, I could never...

Do we go where He has not led? NO! But, do we hide from the places He does lead under the cloak of I could never...

Metallica.com :)
I do believe in the beauty of a quiet life and that we, specifically as wives and mothers, are called to be keepers of our home and disciplers of our families, which has unique looks for different families. But, I also believe that I can invite in children and mothers, as I keep my home and family, who have never known or may never know what it is to encounter a quiet life because they have not heard of the grace that could be theirs.

That's not missional living. It's obedience. It's faith. It's hospitality. It's inviting in because I have been invited.

I am not amazing because I have extra kids in my home. I am radically loved by an amazing Savior.

After the dog comment this past weekend, I asked some of my close foster mama friends how they responded to the, I could nevers...

Humble your heart, and be challenged.

I don't think I can either, but I will trust God and know that I am an adult and can deal with the heartache knowing I am doing what I am called to do. This child needs bonding and love through a tough time.

You'd be amazed at the power of prayer, God prepares HIS people...a wise friend of mine who is another foster mama once told me "if you're heart isn't getting broken, then you aren't doing something right."

We have cushy lives.  It's not about me. It's about HIM, and how HE prepares us. If He's called us to it, He will bring you through it.

Before I ever thought seriously about fostering, I said that statement to a foster mom, and she simply said, "It's not about you." Blunt, to the point, and true.

I don't have a choice. God called me to foster, and I know they're leaving, so you just do what you've got to do. I love with an open heart and open hands.

You know the story of Jonah? I ran from this calling for years. I told myself it was too hard; I'm single; I'm busy; I'm lousy at goodbyes..but one day I said yes. Turns out starting my foster care ministry was like coming out of the belly of that stinky whale. Life didn't get easier, but the air is fresh and I feel good in HIS service.

We trust that The Lord would be faithful to sustain us through it... And that foster care is a constant reminder that none of my children are ultimately mine. I have no more control over what happens in my foster son's life than I do in the lives of my other two kids. You have to trust in God's sovereignty and his goodness.

You could if God called you to it. But, if He never does; support someone who answered the call.

God will carry us through. This is so very hard, and it's an emotional roller coaster and I cry - I cry a lot! But the love and the blessing we get from her ALWAYS brings me back to why we do it. It isn't about us, its about those precious souls that we are taking back from the one who wants to see them fail and believe the lies he will and is putting in their sweet little minds. God is so good and I have no doubt that He will sustain us and see us through whatever comes our way. I tell them that we are so thankful to be a part of what He has called us to do!

Yes, you could. Christ lived and walked in the broken, dark places of this world and we must do the same...no matter the cost.

This life, when you have given your life and your heart to Christ, is not yours anymore. The big picture is that it's not about "me" and how bad it will break MY heart when they go. It's really about what I can do for them with Christ in me. Pouring into them for the time I have been given with them and not holding anything back just because I don't know how long I will have them. It's an honor to "get to" do ministry through foster care and a blessing to get to love on little ones in the process!!!

How could we not?

God doesn't call the equipped; he equips the called.

Because of the One who surrendered His quiet life to serve us,


  1. I have found through this that God gives you the heart for the work he's called you to do. In the desert, He gave people the amount of manna they needed at the time. People who needed much got much; people who needed little got little. It works the same way with grace.

    1. Alli, so true. So good. Thank you, Friend.